Doing relationships differently: rural baby boomers negotiate friends-with-benefits relationships

Submission note: A thesis submitted in total fulfilment of the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy to the La Trobe Rural Health School, College of Science, Health and Engineering, La Trobe University, Bundoora.

People in midlife and later life are enjoying diverse types of intimate relationships and sexual expression outside hetero-monogamy, yet these relationships are largely invisible and not recognised in planning, policy or health care. In a climate of social and demographic changes, relationship types and ways of living intimate citizenship in Australia are expanding. The focus of this research is rural Australians in midlife: past research on friends-with-benefits relationships (FWBR) has been mostly conducted in North America using convenience college student populations. The experience of 22 Australian rural baby boomers in FWBR is explored using in-depth interviews to identify the effect of the relationships on their wellbeing, their beliefs about sexual health risks, and use of sexual health services. Thematic analysis of interview transcripts provides empirical evidence about midlife relationships. The FWBR was a positive experience with participants reporting independence, increased agency and more enjoyable sexual experiences in midlife. Participants’ beliefs about sexual health risk varied, as did their access to sexual health services. Living in a rural location has implications for privacy, confidentiality and fear of stigma from having a non-traditional relationship, and for some participants health service access is limited. Findings are located in wider fields of social change in relationships, including intimate citizenship; and midlife and older adult sexuality and sexual health. This research contributes empirical evidence that reveals the diversity and complexity of midlife FWBR, and is the basis for policy, practice and research recommendations. Midlife and older adults are expected to contribute to the community and economy well into later life. To ensure optimal wellness, sexual health must be considered in their overall health care and there is a need for community awareness of, and respect for, diverse relationships.